i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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