I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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