we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize