I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize