This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
