I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
