CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
