Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize