just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
