I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
