Farmville is her only friend.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
