It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Randomize
