I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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