Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
