hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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