we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
