it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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