You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
