Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
