I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
