Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Fuck appropriateness.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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