yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize