You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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