oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
