it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
