we have officially lost it.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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