i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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