i just had sex bonerless
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize