you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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