Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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