oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
