Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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