I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize