wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
