Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
