i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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