Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize