I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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