i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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