and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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