I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
