Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
