I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
