halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
