oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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