My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
