I just saw a hot homeless man
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
