: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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