This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
