Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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