Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
